Blam

I'm much more aware of the time, now. The time taken choosing to do nothing. Time spent thinking.

Whether it's a past or future decision, the hesitation and reflection are what will trip you up in the next round. They're the biggest affectors, and put a frieze on now, or at least a tighter reign on the time you do have. The irony makes me laugh, but it also makes the serious need for a balance between long-range planning and adaptability obvious. Like navigating by star-map, you can only watch the sky very briefly before you're walking into trees and stumbling over embankments.

One sliver of awareness is gradually creeping into my lifestyle, though: No matter if you plan the action, life is going to move forward. When faced with a situation that is easily morphed into routine we tend to get stuck on one arbitrary way of doing something, whether planned or not. The decision of whether to plan or to be spontaneous gets trumped by an attachment to our own predictions; we like to think we are our own most prolific fortune-tellers.

Being aware of the availability of choice, on the other hand, can lead to paralysis. But...

Even inaction spurs consequences. Sometimes it allows you to forsake the option to choose. Someone else chooses for you. A conclusion is made in your absence. The deadline passes, and no harm is done. Whether it's due to your own directed indirection, procrastination, or an oversight in a packed schedule, something will happen. It always does.

Just don't make a habit of it. Spontaneous routine is the name of the game. It's what makes those who have "interesting" lives feel alive. Unimportant matters, which don't exist in concrete, should be the only ones falling victim to predictability. And even then, only sometimes.

Ya got to have fun with your life, after all.

Lastly, a little medical note:

Chronic inaction is a fatal disease to those who are able, capable, and creative. Which is everyone. So get yourself tested, man.